Getting an apartment with your best friend might be an option if you're ready to leave your parents' home, but there are reasons not to room with your best friend. The cost-of-living is skyrocketing in many cities throughout the nation and many young adults discover they can't afford a basic apartment on their own. Your choices are simple: either stay home a little longer or get a roommate. But before you propose this idea to your bestie, here are seven reasons not to room with your best friend.
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1. Living Habits Aren't a Match
This is one of the biggest reasons not to room with your best friend. Living together may seem like fun, but you need to consider whether your living habits are a match. For example, you might be a neat freak while your friend is a slob. You might go to bed early while your friend stays up late playing music. Ideally, you need a roommate with the same lifestyle as you.
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Sure, you both adore each other's company, but daily living routines can make or break a harmonious household. Imagine constantly grappling with differing standards of cleanliness or clashing sleep schedules. It's not just about the little things like dishes or laundry; it's also about respecting personal space and managing noise levels. Having a friend become a roommate might test the boundaries of your friendship when trivial annoyances start to pile up. Before signing a lease, it’s crucial to have an honest conversation about how each of you likes to manage your home environment. This preemptive step can save you from potential conflict and preserve your friendship.
2. You Might Become Co-dependent on Each Other
You're obviously comfortable around your best friend, and in your mind, this person makes the perfect roommate. But at the same time, spending too much time with your best friend isn’t always a good thing. The two of you may unknowingly become too dependent on each other. As a result, you may rob yourself the opportunity to branch out and meet new people.
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Being glued at the hip isn't just a cliché. When your bestie is also your roommate, every problem, triumph, or mundane detail of life gets shared instantly. But where's the mystery in that? The thrill of a catch-up coffee after a few days apart vanishes. Instead, you risk your conversations becoming the equivalent of bland, reheated coffee. More so, when challenges arise, you may find it harder to approach them independently, leaning heavily on each other to the point where personal growth takes a back seat to comfortable co-dependence. Go ahead, cherish your friend, but remember, a little space is a spice that keeps friendships zesty.
Frequently asked questions
It can be. Sometimes living together can strain the friendship. You might see sides of each other you never had to deal with before.
It depends. While it can be fun, it can also lead to conflicts. Sharing living space demands good boundaries and communication.
Small things like cleaning habits, noise, and guests can blow up into big issues. Plus, you might struggle with balancing personal space and friend time.
Sadly, yes. Disagreements over finances, chores, or personal habits can sometimes create lasting resentments.
Keeping your friendship and living situations separate can actually strengthen your bond. It gives you both space to grow and miss each other in a positive way!
3. You’re Not Ready to Live on Your Own
Understandably, your parents' rules might become annoying as you reach a certain age but this doesn't suggest running out and getting your own place. Living on your own is no joke, and you have to be ready for this responsibility. Even with a roommate splitting expenses, the cost of living on your own might surprise you. There's rent, utilities, insurance, food and other personal expenses. Count the cost to determine whether you can meet these expenses each month.
4. Personalities Might Clash
You and your best friend might have a lot in common but currently, you spend time together and then go to your own homes. When you live with your best friend, you might discover habits or personality traits that you don't like. And when you spend too much time with someone, your personalities can clash. I'm not suggesting rooming with your best friend will ruin your relationship, but it might create tension.
5. Your Friend Isn’t Responsible
The person you decide to live with needs to be responsible. He or she will be responsible for half the rent and other household expenses. Therefore, seriously consider whether you can trust this person financially. For example, your best friend shouldn't spend rent money buying clothes or entertaining. If so, the bulk of expenses might fall in your lap, which can also create tension. If your best friend has trouble managing her money now, this isn’t going to change just because you’re renting a place together.
6. No down Time
With you and your best friend living under the same roof, you might have less free time for yourself. Your friend might want to hang out every night and do everything together. But if you enjoy your space, this behavior can get on your nerves.
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The seemingly endless sleepovers may sound fun initially, but the lack of personal downtime can strain even the strongest of friendships. If you're someone who cherishes solitude to recharge, sharing your living space might mean constantly having to negotiate boundaries. Compromises are part of cohabitation, but when it involves your bestie, the stakes are higher and the expectations greater. Be prepared to have open and, sometimes, uncomfortable conversations about needing space without making your friend feel neglected or excluded. It's a delicate balance to maintain, but crucial for the health of both your friendship and personal well-being.
7. Money Can Complicate Relationships
I firmly believe in separating friendship and money, which includes rooming with a close friend. Anything can happen. Your friend might skip out on the lease early, or pay her share of the bills late, which might have a damaging effect on your credit score.
Living with your best friend isn't the worst thing in the world, but you should acknowledge possible problems with this living arrangement. Think carefully before bring up this idea or signing a lease. If you feel that rooming with your best friend could potentially damage your relationship, you’re better off staying home or selecting a different roommate. Do you think it's smart to room with a best friend?
Comments
QueenJ: I planned to move in with my bestfriend in college and I pray none of this happens
missalliedee: Everyone one of my friends who moved in with a friend regretted it a lot. I found my roommate online and we've become friends through living together. Sooo glad I went that route.
Love: I still want 2 bunk wid my BFF
Althea: I agree and this had really maid me think on who I want to live with when I am old enuf to get my own place;)
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