There are numerous practical ways to confess money problems to your partner or spouse. You may be embarrassed by your amount of credit card debt or the fact that you have a spending problem. At the end of the day, your spouse will probably support you and help you through the issue however, you need to fess up sooner rather than later. Here are seven ways to confess money problems to your partner.
1. Assess the Damage
Assessing the damage first is one of the best ways to confess money problems to your partner. To accomplish this, you need to review your financial situation in order to provide your partner with clear answers. For example, if you have a ton of credit card debt, add up your total debt. And if you have a spending problem, tally up the amount you’ve spent over the last few shopping trips.
2. Choose the Most Appropriate Time
The truth is, your spouse may not be happy to hear about your money confession therefore, you need to choose a time that's appropriate to have this discussion. The time is not when your spouse comes home from work, as he or she may be stressed and tired. Additionally, you should not bring up this issue in front of friends or family. Make sure your spouse or partner is relaxed and calm.
3. Have a Mediator
If you believe that your spouse will be furious, having a mediator can defuse any bad situation. For example, your partner may blow up if he or she warned you about a spending problem in the past, and you didn't heed this advice. A mediator is someone who can keep the conversation on track, and possibly calm a tense situation. This can be a trusted friend, a relative, or maybe a financial advisor.
4. Own up to Your Mistakes
Your spouse may handle the confession better if you own up to your mistakes and make apologies. Everyone makes mistakes, therefore you shouldn't be overly embarrassed or ashamed. Your spouse undoubtedly has made mistakes in the past, although these may have been related to a different area. If you minimize your mistake or make excuses, this can upset your partner.
5. Be Honest
And while you're owning up to your mistakes, it's important to be honest and upfront. For example, if you have $10,000 worth of credit card debt, minimizing the problem and saying that you owe less will not help the situation. In all likelihood, your spouse will discover that you lied.
6. Let Him or Her Cool off
Depending on the severity of your money mistakes, your spouse or partner may be extremely upset. If he or she walks away or doesn't want to speak at the moment, give your partner the opportunity to cool off. He may simply need time to digest what you’ve told him. But once time passes, you’re able to work through the issue together.
7. Take Steps to Resolve the Issue
Your partner or spouse may also deal with the situation better if you've taken steps to get the situation under control. For example, if you have a lot of credit card debt, but you’ve recently cut your cards in half, he may see this as a sign that you're ready to make improvements. This action can work in your favor.
As afraid as you may be, never put off confessing money mistakes to your partner. Even if you're able to hide your mistakes, he or she will eventually find out. And if he finds out on his own, this can impact your relationship and cause trust issues.
What are other ways to confess money problems?